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Welcome to “I’ve Got This” — Refinery29 and Plan B One-Step’s exploration of the pivotal, transformative life moments in which we’re reminded of our strength. Ahead, hear from one woman about the object she looks to as a reminder of her own fortitude.

Every morning on Mulafara Street in Chittagong, Bangladesh, a lanky man would walk down our road, shouldering a branch lined with bunches of bananas. “Bananas! Bananas! One TAKA!” he’d yell. My grandmother would drop a string down from our balcony with a one-taka coin attached, her bangles jingling, and the man would tie exactly five bananas to the string before she reeled it back up.

Each afternoon, the sun set right as the fourth prayer call sang from the mosque and rang across the entire town. That’s how I learned to tell time. That’s how my grandmother told time her entire life.

When I was four, we moved to New York — and time began to move differently. It was rapid and frantic. Everything sounded new — no bangles clanking, bananas, or call to prayer to punctuate the passing of each day.

In our Brooklyn home, I would sit inside and picture our apartment back in Bangladesh — how I would return home to the jingles of women’s bracelets brushing against pans while they made “botha,” the Bengali word for mashed potatoes. My aunts would hand me garlic to peel, but my tiny fingers couldn’t grasp the cloves properly. They would drop to the floor, and everyone would laugh.

All the women in my family dressed impeccably, even when they worked in the kitchen. They wore thick gold bangles when they were home. In Bangladesh, I watched them all gather — my mom, her sisters, my aunts, my grandmothers. When they went out to a wedding or a party, they wore their glass bracelets in blues, greens, and purples, selected to match the fabric of their dresses.

On one particular afternoon, having just returned from a game of soccer, my grandmother told me to go change for that night’s party. I was ecstatic — it was rare that I was given the opportunity to tag along. Next to my sequined dress she laid out a set of her red bangles for me to wear.

I watched the women dance and sing before we went out. They all had long, dark hair flowing down their backs, and the summer mosquitoes looked like butterflies to me. I couldn’t dance or sing like them, so I cried while the baul music played. The bangles on my wrists were too big — they’d dangle off my hands if I moved, it wasn’t fair.

By the time I turned 10, we stopped going to Bangladesh to visit in the summer. We lived in a big, Victorian house in Brooklyn, and my parents wanted my brother and me to focus our time and energy on our life here. They wanted to ensure that we would get into the “right schools,” and behave in all the “right ways.” I was supposed to thrive academically, make American friends — while still spending my weekends reciting verses at the local mosque and attending my cousins’ harmonium recitals. On one occasion, my mom laid out a traditional dress for me to wear to a family friends’ birthday. I rejected it. She wore her gold bangles, and I listened as they clanked against each other, wishing she wouldn’t make so much noise as we walked.

In that time period, in place of more traditional dress, I wore T-shirts plastered with popular punk band logos and blue jeans — and I tucked those red bangles away, far from my sight, in a jewelry box under my bed. I didn’t touch them until I moved to Boston for college at age 17.

At the time, I thought Boston was the perfect escape for me. It was five hours away from home — not too far, but far enough for me to feel as if I could leave any cross-cultural baggage at home. During my junior year, I saw an international student from the Netherlands wear a set of white bangles at a frat party. The ease with which she wore them struck me in a way I couldn’t articulate that night — like I had seen an old friend. It was confusing but tantalizing. That evening, I pulled the bangles out from under my bed and gazed at them. But rather than put them on, I simply returned them to their place.

After I graduated from college, I moved to D.C., and I began to feel a sense of ease that I had never before felt in America. My roommate Emma insisted everyone call me Shar-meen, the proper pronunciation of my name. For most of my life, I had never bothered to correct anyone, but now, Emma did it for me. I met my best friend Parth — he was Indian-American with green eyes reminiscent of my aunts’. He was always fluttering around, showing me videos of a Bollywood fusion group he led in Wisconsin. I started seeking out literature, movies, friends who celebrated their cultures, all of which served as a distinct inspiration to me. I began to find solace in place of isolation in my new life — one where I was open, and curious, and proud.

A year into living in D.C., my grandmother in Bangladesh passed away. I had just started a new job, and my parents insisted that the logistics would be too complicated for me to attend her funeral. I left work early that day, and walked along 14th Street back to my apartment, where I knelt down and pulled the boxes I’d hidden out from underneath my bed. I rifled through the memorabilia from my childhood: concert tickets, celebrity magazine cut-outs, band T-shirts, and among all the American markers of my youth, the set of red bangles. I pulled them onto my wrists, and marveled at the fact that they fit; they no longer slid off as they had when I was a little girl.

Now, my bangles sit on my dresser, proudly displayed beside my family photos rather than tucked away beneath my bed. When friends come over, they ask about them — they seem to glow, to catch everyone’s attention. I tell them all about the bracelets — and about my grandmother, my aunts, and the botha potato dish. It can be strange to hear myself talk with such pride and joy about something that gave me such great discomfort for so many years.

Last year, I went home for a family wedding. I hadn’t returned to Brooklyn to visit my parents in years. I wore a traditional dress I had picked out myself in New York, selected to match my lovely, red bangles and my kundan earrings. My mom looked at me, glowing with pride, all night long. As the ceremony ended, I watched the bride as she was leaving with her husband, her own glass bangles shining in the light. I closed my eyes and thought about myself as a child: I thought about my grandmother and my aunts, all dressed up for the evening’s festivities, long hair swaying, dancing to the baula around me until they shuffled out the door, leaving me with just the sound of chimes and clinking bangles.

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Mere days after they announced they were suing the publisher of The Daily Mail, Prince Harry and Meghan Markle are reportedly suing two other tabloids. CNN reports that the royals have filed a lawsuit with The Sun and The Daily Mirror over allegations of phone hacking. 

A representative for Buckingham Palace confirmed to CNN that the issue is over “the illegal interception of voicemail messages.” It is unclear which voicemails the royal couple is referencing at this time. 

The news comes after Prince Harry published an impassioned open letter on his official website, stating he was suing The Mail for publishing a private letter from Meghan to her father, Thomas Markle. 

“In addition to their unlawful publication of this private document, they purposely misled you by strategically omitting select paragraphs, specific sentences, and even singular words to mask the lies they had perpetuated for over a year,” Prince Harry wrote of the alleged actions of The Mail. 

This is not the first time the royal family have taken legal action with the press over allegations of phone hacking. In 2005, a story about a Prince William injury was published in now-defunct British tabloid News of the World — owned by media mogul Rupert Murdoch, who also owns The Sun — prompting allegations from the royal family that their voicemails were being hacked. News of the World editor Clive Goodman and private investigator Glenn Mulcaire were convicted of conspiracy to hack into said voicemails in 2007. 

Though the Press Complaints Commission found no evidence of phone hacking in 2009, a 2011 investigation by British Metropolitan Police discovered the publication was indeed engaging in the practice from 2004 to 2006. News of the World publicly apologized for the actions, and folded in July of 2011. It has compensated victims of the hacking. 

Jonny Dymond, a royal correspondent for the BBC, claims that Prince Harry’s current lawsuit could stem from the scandal from the early 2000s. This would be long before he met Meghan, whom he was defending when the couple issued their lawsuit against The Mail. 

Prince Harry’s issues with how the press treats the royal family can be traced  back to his mother Princess Diana’s death in a car accident, after she was being pursued by paparazzi on motorcycles. 

“I’ve seen what happens when someone I love is commoditized to the point that they are no longer treated or seen as a real person,” the royal wrote in his open letter. “I lost my mother and now I watch my wife falling victim to the same powerful forces.”

Refinery29 has reached out to The Sun, The Daily Mirror, and representatives for Prince Harry and Meghan for comment.

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It’s been two years since the New York Times and New Yorker investigation into the sexual misdeeds of Harvey Weinstein unleashed the #MeToo movement and a courageous fury over the ways women are mistreated. We look back at the movement that has completely reshaped the way we think of men, women, sex, and power.

Where were you on Thursday, October 5, 2017, the day it all started? We were at our desks, driving carpools, scrolling through emails on the train. We heard buzz swarming around a New York Times story. We knew it was big. We didn’t know how big. In the Times story, reporters Jodi Kantor and Megan Twohey converted years of brushed-away rumors into an on-the-record reveal: Mega-influential Hollywood producer Harvey Weinstein had allegedly been systematically sexually harassing and sexually assaulting women for decades, including many of your favorite actresses. (Weinstein continues to deny the allegations, insisting the encounters were consensual.)

The exposé and the outpouring of stories that followed on Twitter and beyond — now known as the #MeToo movement, inspired by activist Tarana Burke’s coining of the phrase in 2006 — forced a conversation about the intersection of gender and power. When spoken in the booming collective, women’s voices became too loud to dismiss. People started talking about their painful experiences with sexual harassment, sexual assault, and everyday, casual sexism. One year on, and we’re still listening.

The #MeToo movement has affected public discourse and had tangible repercussions in workplaces in every arena. It has resulted in palpable changes: CEOs ousted, candidates defeated, public figures disgraced. Most recently, we saw a televised, quasi-job interview in which a prospective Supreme Court judge’s past alleged incident of sexual misconduct was brought against him. Weinstein’s downfall was the catalyst we needed, but the women’s movement had been gaining momentum earlier in 2017, beginning with the Women’s March and bleeding into the ousting of powerful men. These are the most significant events that mark the radical shift in our cultural outlook regarding sexual misconduct, power dynamics, and the strength of women’s words.

2006: Activist Tarana Burke founds the nonprofit organization Just Be Inc., which serves survivors of sexual harassment and abuse. Burke calls her nonprofit’s movement “Me Too.” The phrase came to Burke in 1997 after she heard a 13-year-old sexual abuse survivor share her story during a youth camp. “I didn’t have a response or a way to help her in that moment, and I couldn’t even say ‘me too,’” Burke told the New York Times.

January 21, 2017: On the first full day of Donald Trump’s presidency, millions of people participate in the Women’s March on Washington to support gender equality and civil rights. While the March is based in Washington, D.C., there are other protests in cities around the world. The Women’s March on Washington is believed to be the largest single-day demonstration in U.S. history.

July 6, 2016: Gretchen Carlson files a sexual harassment suit against Fox News head Roger Ailes, setting off a stream of similar allegations. On July 21, Ailes resigns from his position, though he denies the harassment charges. The case remains unsettled because Ailes die in May 2017.

February 19, 2017: Uber employee Susan Fowler publishes a 3,000 word essay about her “very, very strange” year at Uber, in which she describes a toxic workplace culture where sexual harassment and misconduct occurred frequently. The essay leads to the resignation of Uber co-founder and CEO Travis Kalanick and the firing of 20 other employees who allegedly contributed to the company culture. Even before the #MeToo movement begins, other Silicon Valley companies see the ousting of CEOs following similar charges.

April 1, 2017: An explosive New York Times article details five women’s allegations of sexual harassment and misconduct against Fox News anchor Bill O’Reilly. After the article, advertisers begin to drop the O’Reilly Factor. President Donald Trump defends O’Reilly, saying he didn’t think “Bill did anything wrong.” Pressure mounts, and O’Reilly is eventually ousted from his position on April 17. O’Reilly denies the allegations, calling it a “political and financial hit job.”

October 6, 2015: Almost precisely two years before she was quoted in the Times exposé, Ashley Judd writes an essay in Variety detailing being sexually harassed by a then-unnamed media boss in a hotel room, who she now says was Harvey Weinstein.

October 5, 2017: Along with other actresses and former Weinstein Company employees, Ashley Judd accuses Weinstein of sexual harassment — this time, on the record — in Jodi Kantor and Meghan Twohey’s incriminating New York Times story. In the aftermath, Weinstein publishes a public apology, the first of many public apologies the year would hold. The first sentence of Weinstein’s statement attributed his behavior to growing up in “the ‘60s and ‘70s, when all the rules about workplace and behavior were different,” and insisted the encounters were consensual. In the ensuing days, over 100 women would could come forward with allegations against Weinstein.

October 8, 2017: Weinstein is fired by his production company, the Weinstein Company.

October 10, 2017: In a New Yorker article by Ronan Farrow, 13 more women describe sexual harassment or assault at the hands of Weinstein. Farrow would then follow up his reporting with another New Yorker story published on November 6, in which he detailed how Weinstein allegedly used ex-Mossad agents to spy on women he feared would publicly condemn him for his alleged actions.

October 12, 2017: Roy Price, head of Amazon Studios, is suspended from his position after producer Isa Hackett accuses him of sexual harassment. Hackett first filed the claim in 2015. Price would ultimately resign five days later, on October 17.

October 16, 2017: The #MeToo hashtag movement is born on Twitter after Alyssa Milano encourages people to share their stories of sexual harassment and abuse in order to illustrate the near universality of the problem. #MeToo quickly becomes an international phenomenon, with women different countries translating the hashtag or creating their own. In France, “#BalanceTonPorc”, meaning “rat out your pig,” goes viral; in the Arab world, “#Ana_kaman,” translating to “me too,” is used millions of times.

October 18, 2017: Gymnast McKayla Maroney tweets about her sexual assault at the hands of U.S.A. gymnastics doctor Larry Nassar. After that, more than 150 other women would come forward with similar stories. In January 2018, Nassar would be sentenced to 40-175 years in prison for sexual abuse.

October 19, 2017: Repercussions of the #MeToo movement begin to affect many industries. On October 19, Lockhart Steele, Vox Media’s editorial director, is fired for sexual harassment. Within this week alone, sexual misconduct allegations are raised against restaurateur John Besh, director James Toback, fashion photographer Terry Richardson, Artforum publisher Knight Landesman, and journalist Mark Halperin. The list continues to grow: According to an in-depth infographic by Vox, over 200 celebrities, CEOs, and politicians have been accused of sexual misconduct.

October 29, 2017: Anthony Rapp tells BuzzFeed News that Kevin Spacey made a sexual advance at him when he was 14. In response to Rapp’s story about underage advances, Spacey announces he is gay, and claims he does not remember his encounter with Rapp. “But if I did behave as he describes, I owe him the sincerest apology for what would have been deeply inappropriate drunken behavior, and I am sorry for the feelings he describes having carried with him all these years,” Spacey writes. In the ensuing days and months, many more men would come forward with allegations. As of July 2018, there are six open sexual assault cases against Spacey in the U.K. Spacey is currently in rehab for sex addiction.

November 8, 2017: A month before All the Money in the World is set to premiere, director Ridley Scott reshoots all of Kevin Spacey’s scenes with Christopher Plummer, erasing Spacey (who played J.P. Getty) from the film. Plummer racks up a third Best Supporting Actor nomination as a result. It later emerges that Michelle Williams was paid for $1,000 for reshoots, while her co-star Mark Wahlberg walked away with $1.5 million, spurring another conversation about equal pay and gender parity.

November 9, 2017: Four women accuse Roy Moore, the Republican candidate for U.S. Senate in an Alabama special election, of sexual misconduct in a Washington Post article. Five more women would join them, raising the number of women who said Moore pursued them when they were teenagers to nine.

November 9, 2017: Comedian Louis C.K. is accused by five women of sexual misconduct. The next day, C.K. confirms the reports. The movie I Love You, Daddy, which C.K. directed, was scheduled to premiere on November 17, but instead is dropped by the distribution company. C.K. buys the film’s rights back.

November 17, 2017: Senator Al Franken is accused of inappropriate groping during a 2006 USO trip by radio host Leann Tweeden. More women come forward with their own experiences. Franken resigns from his position as senator on December 7.

November 29, 2017: The Today Show begins with the announcement that Matt Lauer has been fired by NBC for sexual misconduct. In April 2018, Lauer publicly denies the allegations.

December 4, 2017: President Donald Trump enthusiastically endorses Roy Moore, the Alabama Senate candidate accused of sexual misconduct, on Twitter.

December 6, 2017: Time Magazine names “the Silence Breakers,” the men and women who spoke about their experiences with sexual misconduct, as Person of the Year.

December 7, 2017: In an L.A. Times op-ed, Dylan Farrow questions why her father, Woody Allen, has been spared from intense scrutiny by the #MeToo movement. Farrow has long maintained that Allen sexually assaulted her when she was seven years old. Allen denies the charges.

December 11, 2017: Mario Batali is accused of sexual misconduct by four women in an Eater article. Four days later, Batali is fired as one of four hosts of ABC’s The Chew. As of May 21, 2018, Batali is under investigation by the NYPD for sexual assault charges, which Batali denies.

December 13, 2017: Roy Moore is defeated by democrat Doug Jones in the Alabama special election. The #MeToo movement was credited for giving women a safe space to come forward and influence the election. This is the first time an Alabama Democrat won a seat in the Senate in 25 years.

December 19, 2017: Women factory workers at Ford go on the record about rampant sexual harassment at two Chicago plants in a New York Times exposé.

January 1, 2018: Time’s Up, an initiative spearheaded by 300 women working film, TV, and theater, is announced with an open letter in the New York Times and in the Spanish language newspaper La Opinion. The Time’s Up Legal Defense Fund is aimed at supporting the sexual assault and harassment cases of less-privileged individuals.

January 7, 2018: The #MeToo and Time’s Up movements are present at the Golden Globe awards. Actors and actresses participate in a red carpet “blackout” by wearing black gowns and Time’s Up pins. The event’s proceedings are heavily colored by the atmosphere in Hollywood. While accepting the Cecil B. DeMille Award for Lifetime Achievement, Oprah Winfrey praises the women who came forward with their stories. “For too long, women have not been heard or believed if they dared to speak the truth to the power of those men. But their time is up. Their time is up,” Winfrey said. Awards go to works that depict strong women, like Big Little Lies and Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri.

January 10, 2018: Writer Moira Donegan comes forward as the creator of the Shitty Media Men list, an anonymous Google spreadsheet dating back to October that allowed people to collate rumors and incidents of sexual misconduct regarding men in media, after Donegan learns Harper’s Magazine planned to dox her identity in an article. About 70 men were accused in total. The Harper’s article runs in the March 2018 issue, and indeed names Donegan as the list’s creator.

January 11, 2018: Five women accuse James Franco of inappropriate behavior in an article in the L.A. Times. The first allegation comes days before on the evening of the Golden Globes, when actress Violet Paley tweets her experiences with Franco. James Franco responds to allegations on the Late Show with Stephen Colbert. “I don’t want to shut them down in any way. I think it’s a good thing and I support it,” Franco says. Franco wins a Golden Globe for his role in The Disaster Artist, but is ignored by the Academy Awards.

January 14, 2018: In an article on Babe.net, a photographer who went by the alias “Grace” recalls a murky sexual experience with comedian Aziz Ansari, spurring a conversation about the role of consent in typical, quotidien sexual encounters. The next day, Ansari responds that he took Way’s “words to heart” and that he “continues to support the movement that is happening in our culture. It is necessary and long overdue.”

January 20, 2018: Millions participate in the second annual Women’s March.

February 3, 2018: In a New York Times article, Uma Thurman recalls the time Harvey Weinstein allegedly forced himself on her in a London hotel room. Thurman also recounts a harrowing near-death experience on the set of Kill Bill, claiming that director Quentin Tarantino coerced her to do a dangerous stunt. In an interview with Deadline, Tarantino called the crash “one of the biggest regrets” of his life.

March 4, 2018: The #MeToo and Time’s Up movements come to the Oscars. During a dedicated segment, Annabella Sciorra, Ashley Judd, and Salma Hayek, three of Weinstein’s many accusers, spoke of the movements and the changes they hope to see take place in Hollywood and beyond. “We salute those unstoppable spirits who kicked ass and broke through the bias perception against their gender, race, and ethnicity to tell their stories,”Hayek says. After winning Best Actress for her work in Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri, Frances McDormand ends the Oscars with an incendiary call-to-arms masquerading as an acceptance speech. “Look around, ladies and gentlemen, because we all have stories to tell and projects we need financed. Don’t talk to us about it at the parties tonight; invite us into your office in a couple days — or you can come to ours, whichever suits you best — and we’ll tell you all about them,” McDormand says. She also introduces the world to inclusion riders.

April 16, 2018: Jodi Cantor and Megan Twohey of the New York Times and Ronan Farrow of The New Yorker win the Pulitzer Prize for public service.

April 29, 2018: At the Tribeca Film Festival, Time’s Up reports that 2,500 women have sought help from its Legal Defense Fund.

April 30, 2018: R. Kelly’s Chicago concert is cancelled. Other shows, including one in New York, are cancelled. Despite a July 2017 Buzzfeed article that exposed R. Kelly’s “sex cult,” Kelly’s career had remained relatively unaffected by allegations until 2018. The women’s movement allowed the #MuteRKelly movement, started by Kenyette Barnes and Oronike Odeleye, to gain traction. “We’re calling for a complete and total mute. We don’t want to hear him on the radio. We do not want him on streaming services. We do not want him booked at concerts. We want the collective society to erase him from our consciousness. So that he can no longer be insulated from the consequences of his crime,” explained movement founder Odeleye to NPR. On May 10, the music streaming service Spotify removes Kelly from its playlist and algorithmic recommendations as part of its Hate and Hateful Conduct policy, but reverses the policy in June.

May 4, 2018: Writer Zinzi Clemmons claims that writer Junot Díaz forcibly kissed her at a workshop. Other women writers follow suit, accusing Díaz of verbal assault and misogyny. The month prior, Díaz had come forward with his own experiences of childhood sexual assault in a New Yorker essay. Díaz denies the allegations.

May 25, 2018: Harvey Weinstein turns himself into New York authorities to face rape charges related to an accusation by Lucia Evans.

June 25, 2018: A study by New York-based crisis consulting firm Temin & Co demonstrates the breadth of the #MeToo movement’s impact. The study finds at least 417 high-profile executives and employees were outed by the movement over the course of the past 18 months. The accusations spiked after the Weinstein exposé. The statistics were telling: All but seven of the 417 were men, and only 8 were in a consensual relationships with their accusers. The report says 193 have resigned or been fired, 122 suspended, and 69 haven’t been impacted.

July 26, 2018: An article in The Atlantic determines that claims of sexual misconduct have ended 25 political campaigns in 2018 across both Democratic and Republican party lines.

August 6, 2018: Ronan Farrow releases yet another bombshell piece in The New Yorker, this time detailing six allegations of sexual misconduct against CBS CEO Les Moonves. On September 9, Moonves stepped down as CEO. after six more women levelled allegations against him. Moonves claims he will donte $20 million to organizations that support #MeToo.

August 14, 2018: NYU professor Avital Ronnell is accused by a male former doctoral student of unwanted sexual advances. Ronnell denies the allegations. This altercation shows that unhealthy power dynamics are not limited to men preying on women.

August 19, 2018: Asia Argento, one of the first women to come forward against Harvey Weinstein, is accused of sexually assaulting and then paying off her former co-star Jimmy Bennett. The altercation allegedly took place in 2013, when Argento was 37 and Bennett was 17. “Sexual violence is about power and privilege. That doesn’t change if the perpetrator is your favorite actress, activist or professor of any gender,” tweeted Tarana Burke of the incident.

August 28, 2018: Louis C.K. comes back to public life with his a surprise stand-up set at the Comedy Cellar. The audience had a mixed reaction — some applauded, others left the theater. The reaction on the internet was similarly muddled, with some comedians like Michael Che and Michael Ian Black commending his return and others, like Aparna Nancherla, expressing dismay. Following the controversy, the Cellar instituted the following disclaimer on tickets: “If an unannounced appearance is not your cup of tea, you are free to leave (unobtrusively please) no questions asked, your check on the house.”

September 4, 2018: Los Angeles District Attorney’s Office announces that it will not file sexual assault charges against Kevin Spacey and actor Steven Seagal. The D.A.’s office also drops charges against Black-ish actor Anthony Anderson for lack of sufficient evidence.

Sept. 16, 2018: Dr. Christine Blasey Ford is revealed as the woman who accused Supreme Court nominee Brett Kavanaugh of sexual assault when they were in high school in Bethesda, MD. Allegedly, Kavanaugh held Ford down on a bed, smothered her screams with his hand, and attempted to force himself on her. Ford was able to escape. Ford is the first of at least three women to come forward with sexual misconduct allegations against Kavanaugh, including Yale classmate Deborah Ramirez and Julie Swetnick.

September 25, 2018: Bill Cosby is sentenced to three to 10 years in prison for sexual assault. Cosby’s is the first celebrity conviction since the #MeToo movement began. Comedian Hannibal Buress first mentioned Cosby’s alleged actions during a 2014 comedy set, prompting the public to reconsider the once-beloved comic’s treatment of women — and giving Cosby’s accusers space to come forward before the #MeToo movement.

September 27, 2018: The country is captivated watching Dr. Christine Blasey Ford and Brett Kavanaugh testify before the Senate. More than 20 million people tune into the hearing. The Senate vote that will determine whether Kavanaugh will become a Supreme Court Justice is set to occur after the one-week FBI background investigation takes place.

September 28, 2018: Convicted sex offender and film director Roman Polanski announced his first film in the #MeToo era will be called J’Accuse, and will be about a soldier wrongly accused of spying.

October 2, 2018: Leading feminist thinker Rebecca Traister publishes the book Good and Mad, which speaks to the revolutionary power of women’s anger.

October 5, 2018: One year after his outing in the Times, Harvey Weinstein sits in his New York apartment on house arrest, awaiting trial for two counts of criminal sexual act in the first degree, two counts of rape and two counts of predatory sexual assault. He faces a potential life sentence.

October 18, 2018: More than 400 women sue USC, claiming that campus gynecologist Dr. George Tyndall sexually assaulted them. The women allege that the university deliberately concealed abuse by the doctor for a period spanning decades (he previously denied any wrongdoing). In an internal investigation, the university concludes that his examinations constituted sexual assault. Tyndall was fired in 2017, per CNN, and surrenders his medical license in 2019. He pleads not guilty to the allegations. 

October 22, 2018: Uber’s head of corporate development, Cameron Poetzscher, resigns after a Wall Street Journal report unearths sexual misconduct allegations against him. Poetzscher was disciplined by the company the year prior for a pattern of making inappropriate sexual remarks in the workplace and engaging in an affair with a coworker that, while consensual, violated company policies. In a statement, he agrees that the company was right to discipline him.

October 25, 2018: Reports reveal that Google reportedly paid Andy Rubin, the creator of Android mobile software, a $90 million exit package in 2014 despite a credible allegation of sexual misconduct by an employee, plus an additional $2 million per month for four years. Rubin tweets that the allegations a “smear campaign”; two other senior employees, Amit Singhal and Richard DeVaul, also face accusations. Singhal denies “engaging in any such behavior,” per Vanity Fair. DeVaul apologizes for an “error in judgment” in a statement to The New York Times. Still, Singhal receives a payout, and DeVaul is allowed to stay at the company. DeVaul resigns within a week. In response, Google’s CEO, Sundar Pichai, sends an email to the entire company admitting that they have a sexual misconduct problem and that 48 employees were terminated for misconduct in the last two years, 13 of whom were senior managers and above. 

October 26, 2018: Tekashi 6ix9ine is sentenced to four years on probation in his 2015 arrest for the use of a child in a sexual performance for failing to uphold his plea agreement by getting his GED. The girl involved was 13 years old at the time.

November 1, 2018: Google employees stage a worldwide walkout to protest the handling of sexual misconduct allegations against senior employees.

November 12, 2108: Google, Facebook, Airbnb, and eBay announce they are ending forced arbitration in sexual harassment claims. The change in policy paves the way to allow women employees to pursue legal action in court and no longer be subject to the NDAs that are often included in arbitration settlements, and which enable men to hide their past misconduct.

November 28, 2018: Following accusations the previous May, five more women speak out against director Luc Besson, accusing him of behavior ranging from sexual harassment to rape. He denies all of the claims. The total number of women accusing Besson of misconduct is nine.

November 28, 2018: Allegations about how CBS head Les Moonves tried to silence an accuser, Bobbie Phillips, following an incident in 1995, surface. Moonves says he believed the encounter was consensual. An internal investigation establishes that Moonves participated at least one cover-up in an attempt to collect his $120 million severance payout from the company.

December 2, 2018: Neil deGrasse Tyson is accused of sexual misconduct, which he denies. Fox and NatGeo take his shows off the air. Along with the American Museum of Natural History, the networks conduct investigations into the claim, and all find that he should remain employed. 

December 12, 2018: Congress passes legislation requiring members to pay out of their own money to settle sexual misconduct court judgments and settlements. The changes, which pass by an overwhelming majority, also remove obstacles for accusers including forced mediation, a mandatory cooling-off period, and extending protections to Capitol interns and fellows previously omitted from coverage.

December 17, 2018: CBS denies Les Moonves a $120 million severance package after the company’s internal investigation into assault claims against him is finalized. The company’s report finds that Moonves obstructed their investigation, destroyed evidence, and misled investigators. Through his lawyer, Moonves denies “having any nonconsensual sexual relations” and says he “cooperated extensively and fully with investigators.”

December 17, 2018: Orange Is the New Black star Yael Stone alleges that Geoffrey Rush sexually harassed her when the two worked on the play The Diary of a Madman in 2010 and 2011. Stone tells The New York Times she was afraid to speak out in her native Australia, where defamation and libel laws put the burden of proof onto the person or entity who makes allegations — making it difficult for #MeToo stories to come out in the country. Rush denies her allegations. In April 2019, Rush wins a judgment against an Australian paper, the Telegraph, which printed the accusations of another woman who says Rush acted inappropriately towards her. 

December 21, 2018: Five male models file a lawsuit in New York federal court alleging sexual assault and exploitation by photographer Bruce Weber. The lawsuit follows reports from the beginning of 2018 in which over a dozen models made accusations against Weber. Weber denies all the allegations.

December 24, 2018: Kevin Spacey is charged with felony indecent assault and battery by a district court in Massachusetts for allegedly assaulting an 18-year-old in 2016. The next day, Spacey releases a strange video of himself as Frank Underwood from the Netflix drama House of Cards, in which he seems to cast doubt on the allegations. On January 7, 2019, Spacey pleads not guilty in court. In July, prosecutors drop the case after the accuser refuses to testify about alleged deleted text messages which Spacey’s legal team say are material to the case. 

January 2, 2019: Accounts of sexual harassment and reports of sexism from staffers who worked on Bernie Sanders’ 2016 campaign surface, ranging from inappropriate touching, to not treating reports of harassment seriously, to unequal pay for women. Sanders apologizes to any women staffers who feel they were treated unfairly or inappropriately.

January 3, 2019: The documentary Surviving R. Kelly begins a six-episode, three-night run on Lifetime. The reaction online is immediate, prompting new survivors and allegations to come forward and have a massive impact on public sentiment around the singer. Artists who worked with Kelly denounce his actions. RCA Records finally drops Kelly after years of protests. In response, Kelly threatened to create a website detailing the “lies” of his accusers. He maintains his innocence of all accusations and charges.

January 3, 2019: Coachella launches a program called Every One that, among other things, aims to stop sexual harassment and assault at the festival. The results leave something to be desired, with many women unaware that the campaign — or new resources to report sexual misconduct on-site — exist.

January 8, 2019: The New York Police Department closes three investigations of sexual misconduct against celebrity chef Mario Batali due to a lack of evidence. Two cases are beyond the state’s statute of limitations, which was not made retroactive after it was lifted in 2006. Prosecutors are unable to find enough evidence in the third case, an allegation of rape, to bring charges. Batali previously denied having nonconsensual sex and apologized for his behavior when he was initially accused of groping by four women. The sum total of allegations against Batali, however, is enough to prompt his business partners to buy him out of their hospitality group by March and for Eataly to purchase the minority stake he owned in the company by August. 

January 17, 2019: A review by an independent commission finds that Oxfam, a coalition of charities fighting poverty, did not properly address complaints of sexual misconduct and a toxic workplace environment. Winnie Byanyima, executive director of Oxfam International, says in a statement, “It is painfully clear that Oxfam is not immune from sexual and other forms of abuse that stem from the abuse of power. To those who have experienced such unacceptable behaviour: we are sorry, I am sorry, and we will follow up on any cases passed to us by the commission as a matter of urgency.”

January 28, 2019: Leticia Vallejo files a lawsuit against the Marriott hotel chain after allegedly being sexually assaulted by a guest. The housekeeper claims she was put into unsafe working positions, such as being asked to clean the men’s restroom without being given a way to keep people out. She also alleges that when she reported the incident to her supervisors, they laughed and dismissed her. The suit follows a toughening up of regulations for unionized Marriott employees — the hotel at which Vallejo worked is not unionized. Arne Sorenson, chief executive of Marriott International, says the chain is focused on “deterring and combating harassment of any kind.”

January 30, 2019: Opera singer David Daniels and his husband, William Walters, are arrested on charges stemming from a 2010 accusation that they drugged and assaulted a singer. Both men deny the allegations. The arrest makes Daniels the most high-profile person in the world of classical music, at the time, to face accusations as a result of the #MeToo movement. A grand jury indicts Daniels and his husband in Harris County District Court on July 25. Multiple additional sexual allegations against Daniels surfaced from students at the University of Michigan were reported by NPR, who obtained a March memo from the school detailing what they characterize as “a pattern of behavior that is harassing, abusive and exploitative” to students. The university shares their documentation with Daniels along with formal notification they intend to dismiss him in April. Daniels declines to comment on the report to NPR, other than asserting he will address the allegations in the University’s review process. 

February 5, 2019: In conversation with a reporter, Pope Francis acknowledges for the first time the sexual abuse of some nuns by priests, including the use of nuns as sex slaves. The admission follows a 2018 report by the Associated Press investigating the problem of abuse of nuns that spans decades and continents.

February 5, 2019: Alexandra Arce von Herold files a criminal complaint of sexual assault against former Costa Rican President and Nobel Peace Prize winner Óscar Arias. Five additional women come forward days later, claiming they were groped, sexually assaulted, grabbed, and sexually harassed by Arias. Arias denies the allegations leveled by Herold through a lawyer, but declines to comment on the additional allegations.

February 10, 2019: An investigation finds that since 1998, about 380 Southern Baptist leaders and volunteers have faced allegations of sexual misconduct, with 250 employees and volunteers in the last decade charged with sex crimes. More than 700 survivors are reckoning with the effects of that abuse. In June, the Southern Baptist Convention approves a resolution that allows them to expel churches that “act in a manner inconsistent with the Convention’s beliefs regarding sexual abuse” and establishes a committee to review allegations of sexual abuse. 

February 13, 2019: Musician Ryan Adams is accused of sexual misconduct by multiple women, for behavior ranging from emotional abuse to manipulation to graphic texting with an underage fan and aspiring musician. Adams denies the allegations. In the following months, his tour is canceled, as is the release of his album Big Colors.

February 21, 2019: Time’s Up CEO Lisa Borders resigns amid sexual misconduct allegations against her son, Garry “Dijon” Bowden Jr. Bowden denies the allegations. In a statement, Time’s Up says the decision to step down was made by Borders and that the organization agreed.

February 22, 2019: R. Kelly is charged with 10 counts of sexual abuse by the Cook County state’s attorney in Chicago. Three of the alleged survivors were underage. Kelly pleads not guilty.

February 25, 2019: Ex-Trump 2016 campaign staffer Alva Johnson files a federal lawsuit against President Donald Trump in which she claims he kissed her without her consent. She is the first of Trump’s accusers to allege inappropriate conduct during his presidential campaign. The White House, through then-press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders, calls the allegation “absurd on its face” and says it never happened.

February 26, 2019: Wynn Resorts faces a $20 million fine from Nevada gaming regulators and an additional fine in April of $35 million by gambling regulators in Massachusetts for failing to investigate claims of sexual misconduct against Steve Wynn before he resigned in February 2018. A report found that the company’s leadership hid allegations against Wynn, ignored company policy, failed to investigate, and did not report the allegations to the company’s board. Through a lawyer, Wynn denies any allegations of nonconsensual sex. The company does not contest the fines levied against it by either state.

March 7, 2019: In a surprising interview with Gayle King for CBS This Morning, R. Kelly dramatically denies all the sexual abuse allegations against him.

March 19, 2019: New York Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand admits there was “human error” after her office’s investigation of sexual misconduct claims against a staffer in her congressional office. Anne Bradley, Gillibrand’s deputy chief of staff who handled the claim, resigns from her position.

March 29, 2019: Following the publication of Lucy Flores’s essay “An Awkward Kiss Changed How I Saw Joe Biden” on The Cut, in which she details how the former vice president’s unwanted touching made her uncomfortable, six more women come forward to say they felt the same. Three women speak to The Washington Post, two to The New York Times, and one to The Hartford Courant. Biden apologizes in a video online, promising to respect personal space. He also says he is not sorry “in the sense that I think I did anything that was intentionally designed to do anything wrong or be inappropriate.”

March 21, 2019: Six women accuse Michael H. Steinhardt, a New York billionaire and active philanthropist, of propositioning them or making sexual requests when they request donations to various charities and nonprofits. Steinhardt apologizes for his “boorish, disrespectful” comments, but insists they were “meant in jest.”

April 22, 2019: Following the Google walkout in November, organizers say they were targeted by the company for their activism, including being taken off projects, forced to take leave, and demoted. By July, most of the organizers leave the company.

April 24, 2019: More than 200 former Boy Scouts reveal new sexual abuse claims, exposing 150 alleged pedophiles. In a statement, the Boy Scouts of America say, “Any incident of child abuse is one too many, and nothing is more important than the safety and protection of children in our Scouting programs.” 

May 2, 2019: Sexual assault claims in the U.S. military surge, an annual report by the Defense Department reveals. The report finds a 38% increase in unwanted sexual contact from 2016. One out of every 16 military women reported being groped, raped, or otherwise sexually assaulted within the last year. Patrick M. Shanahan, the acting secretary of defense, tells senior military officials that these numbers were “unacceptable” and not up to the standards expected. Shanahan proposes better tracking of officers and training programs, as well as a new program to identify repeat offenders.

May 15, 2019: Following a report detailing Bryan Singer’s alleged abuse of men and underaged boys in The Atlantic, which he denies, the director is dropped from the Red Sonja remake. Singer is replaced by Transparent’s showrunner, Jill Soloway. He has yet to comment on the allegations.

May 19, 2019: After an exposé that reveals life coach Tony Robbins berated abuse survivors and allegations that he made sexual advances on followers, four women come forward to accuse Robbins of sexual misconduct. The women allege Robbins groped them, exposed himself, or made unwanted advances. In the month after these reports emerge, 10 women in total come forward to say Robbins also harassed or abused them. He denies all of the claims. Robbins’ book deal is canceled in the wake of the allegations.

May 22, 2019: Mario Batali faces criminal charges relating to a sexual assault allegation in a Boston restaurant in 2017. Batali pleads not guilty. 

May 28, 2019: The Chi’s season 2 showrunner, Ayanna Floyd Davis, speaks out about why actor Jason Mitchell was dropped from the show. She says “everyone was well aware” of the issues he had with two actresses on the show, and that she reported him to human resources. She directly challenges the claims of the show’s creator, Lena Waithe, that Waithe was unaware of the issues. Michell was previously removed from his role in the Netflix movie Desperados, and his MTV Movie & TV Awards nominations are stripped once the misconduct claims become public. He is also dropped by his management and agency over the allegations. In August, Mitchell posts an Instagram addressing the situation, saying, “don’t believe what you read in the media.”

May 30, 2019: R. Kelly is charged in Cook County with 11 new counts for incidents that took place between 2009 and 2011. The charges include aggravated criminal sexual assault against a minor, which can carry a sentence of up to 30 years in prison. The charges follow intensified investigations from Chicago and Atlanta prosecutors since Surviving R. Kelly aired. Kelly, again, pleads not guilty.

June 18, 2019: Screenwriter Max Landis is accused of sexual misconduct by eight women, with allegations including manipulation, body-shaming, sexual abuse, and rape. He has yet to respond to the allegations.

June 21, 2019: In a published excerpt from her book, Hideous Men, columnist E. Jean Carroll accuses President Donald Trump of raping her. Trump denies her allegations and meeting her. The latter claim is proven untrue by a photo included with the excerpt, which shows Trump, Carroll, Trump’s ex-wife Ivana, and Carroll’s ex-husband, John Johnson, talking at a party in 1987.

July 7, 2019: Billionaire hedge fund manager Jeffrey Epstein is arrested and charged with sex trafficking in New York and Florida. He is accused of sexually exploiting dozens of underage girls by paying them for “massages” and then molesting or sexually abusing them in his Upper East Side and Palm Beach homes. Reid Weingarten, Epstein’s lawyer, says the charges are a do-over of the 2008 case that his client considered an already settled matter. In that case, Epstein pleaded guilty to soliciting sex from girls as young as 14 and was registered as a sex offender. He was given an 18-month jail term and a year under house arrest.

July 9, 2019: Aziz Ansari returns in a Netflix special and addresses the sexual misconduct allegations against him levied in a 2018 Babe.net article. He does not apologize, but says in the past year he hopes he has become “a better person” and that “it was a step forward.” Ansari says, “If that has made not just me, but other guys think about this, and just be more thoughtful and aware and willing to go that extra mile, and make sure someone else is comfortable in that moment, that’s a good thing.”

July 11, 2019: Air Force Gen. John Hyten, who is tapped to be the next vice chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, is accused of sexual misconduct by a military official who was formerly one of his aides. He is accused of sexual assault starting in 2017 and attempting to derail her career after she declined his advances. An Air Force investigation of her accusations finds insufficient evidence to charge or punish the general. His confirmation hearing to become the second most important person in the U.S. military proceeds later in July, despite questions from Sens. Elizabeth Warren and Tammy Duckworth that indicate Hyten may have received special treatment due to his rank. During the hearing, Hyten says he was falsely accused and that “nothing happened, ever.” He is confirmed in September, by a 75-22 vote.

July 27, 2019: SAG finds actor Kip Pardue guilty of serious sexual misconduct, following public allegations by actress Sarah Scott. Pardue is censured and fined $6,000, with the option to take sexual harassment training and half the fee. Pardue, through his legal team, maintains that he did not engage in any nonconsensual behavior. 

August 1, 2019: Warner Bros. Television concludes an investigation into multiple allegations of sexual assault against Extra host A.J. Calloway. The studio severs ties with the host, calling the decision mutual. Calloway continues to deny any wrongdoing.

August 5, 2019: U.S. Olympic team equestrian trainer George Morris is barred for life from the U.S. Equestrian Federation after the conclusion of an investigation into allegations of sexual misconduct involving a minor. Morris emails clients to say he will appeal the decision and that he is “deeply troubled” by the findings which he “contest[s] wholeheartedly.”

August 6, 2019: The Model Alliance sends an open letter to Victoria’s Secret, signed by more than 100 models and Time’s Up, asking the brand to address a sexual misconduct problem in the company. The letter was prompted by allegations of sexual misconduct against photographers Timur Emek, David Bellemere, and Greg Kadel, who worked for the brand in various capacities, and VS parent company L Brands COO Les Wexner’s previous links to sex trafficker and convicted sex offender Jeffrey Epstein. Bellemere and Kadel denied any wrongdoing while Emek has not responded to the allegations against him. Wexner claims Epstein took advantage of him, calling Epstein’s crimes “abhorrent” and condemning them on behalf of L Brands at an investor day presentation. Wexner says he severed ties with Epstein in 2007. L Brands hires outside counsel in July to investigate Epstein’s ties to the brand.

August 7, 2019: Former Michigan State University Dean William Strampel is sentenced to a year in jail for criminal conduct in office and neglect of duty. Strampel was accused of not supervising disgraced U.S. Olympics team doctor Larry Nassar while the latter was under investigation for sexual misconduct. Strampel is acquitted of a charge of criminal sexual misconduct — women students accused him of using his power to proposition, grope, and harass them. 

August 9, 2019: Figure skater Adam Schmidt files a lawsuit accusing coach Richard Callaghan of molesting him for two years, and the U.S. Figure Skating governing body of allowing the coach unrestricted access to minors despite knowing about Schmidt’s accusation. Before the end of August, Callaghan is banned for life from the organization due to this and other allegations. Callaghan’s attorney, Dean Groulx, calls the investigation a “witch hunt” and says the allegations are false.

August 10, 2019: Jeffrey Epstein dies by suicide in prison while awaiting trial in New York on sex trafficking and conspiracy charges. In a statement, the U.S. attorney for the Southern District of New York says their investigation remains ongoing. The criminal case against Epstein is dismissed at the end of August. Attorney General William Barr says “this case will continue on against anyone who was complicit with Epstein.”

August 13, 2019: Nine women tell the Associated Press that opera singer Plácido Domingo sexually harassed and assaulted them. Domingo denies the allegations, but less than a month later, 11 more women come forward to accuse him of similar behavior. By the end of September, Domingo withdraws from all future performances at the Metropolitan Opera.

August 13, 2019: Katy Perry is accused of sexual misconduct by her “Teenage Dream” music video co-star, Josh Kloss. He says the singer exposed his genitals in public at a birthday party, making him uncomfortable. Perry has yet to publicly comment on the allegations.

September 14, 2019: A book excerpt published by the New York Times revealed new details Deborah Ramirez’s allegations of sexual misconduct against Supreme Court Justice Brett Kavanaugh, along with a new account that the justice was seen sexually assaulting an unknown person at a party during his time at Yale. The report inspires calls for Kavanaugh to be impeached and removed from the court. Kavanaugh previously denied Ramirez’s claims and declines to answer questions about the new account. President Donald Trump, who nominated Kavanaugh to the court, tweets that the justice should “start suing people for libel, or the Justice Department should come to his rescue.” 

September 21, 2019:Antonio Brown is released by the New England Patriots after a second woman accuses him of sexual misconduct. Brown’s former trainer, Britney Taylor, alleges in a lawsuit that he sexually assaulted her on multiple occasions and forcibly raped her in 2018. Nike also cuts ties with Brown in the wake of the allegations. Brown denies the accusations.

If you have experienced sexual violence and are in need of crisis support, please call the RAINN Sexual Assault Hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE (4673).

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Ever since my first job at MTV working as a music programmer, I can’t stop trying to match people with music they might like. So, I wrote a book called Record Collecting for Girls and started interviewing musicians. The Music Concierge is a column where I share music I’m listening to that you might enjoy, with a little context. Get everything I’ve recommended this year on Spotify, follow me on Twitter or Facebook, and leave a comment below telling me what you’re listening to this week.

Jessie Reyez “Far Away”

Jessie Reyez shares a haunting song and video with this one, singing to a lover who can’t get papers to be in the same country and lamenting a government that keeps them apart. But in the video she takes on the divide between Trump supporters and immigrants, showing the all too real pain of families who are torn apart by ICE. The wistful tenor of her voice is as impactful and moving as the images of immigrants facing guns and tear gas.

Teenear “Dolla $igns”

If you missed the amplified snaps from early ’00s R&B, Teenear is bringing them back. They’re the star, along with her amazing voice, of this new track. The production here is reminiscent of something I’d expect to hear Usher or Ciara singing over from that time, but it has enough elements of new productions by Mustard and his ilk to still feel modern. What’s old and all-consuming is Teenear’s vocals. They sound steeped in history and sadness but are pushed forward in a way that’s very now. Don’t be surprised when this song hooks you.

Samantha Urbani “Made In Love”

How about a little dance party? I know I could use one. Samantha Urbani brings exactly what I want to it, with a callback to Stacey Q’s “Two of Hearts” beat and the spirit of early ’00s Kylie Minogue. There’s an ethereal vibe to the music that compliments her voice so nicely. I can’t get enough.

DRAMA “Hold On”

Speaking of dance parties, DRAMA keeps mine going with their new single. Am I happy or am I sad when I listen to this track? Is it gossiping about an ex or getting me to shake my booty? Some songs can do both. This Chicago duo have some kind of magic touch to make such an enjoyable song about what sounds like a breakup.

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Smoothing oils. Treatment masks. Exfoliating scrubs. If you haven’t caught on yet — or thought we were about to drop one serious skin-care routine — hair-care products have become just as expansive as any other category in the beauty realm these days. And while, at the end of the day, having too many options to pick from isn’t such a bad problem, it certainly doesn’t hurt to have some help weeding out what actually works from what’s not so worth your time.

That’s why we tapped three of our ultimate hair crushes here at R29 to share the top three products they simply couldn’t live without. From the purple shampoo one fashion writer uses to banish brassiness from her bleached-blonde strands to the non-crunchy styling gel one social media maven uses to define her 3B curls, there’s a product — and styling hack — for each different texture. And the best part? You can shop any one of these hair-care must-haves for half off this month at Ulta Beauty’s Gorgeous Hair Event, happening now through October 26.

Eliza Huber, Fashion Market Writer

Pureology Strength Cure Best Blonde Purple Shampoo

“As someone who’s been bleaching her hair consistently for over four years, there is no product more important to me than purple shampoo. Not only does it keep my hair from getting brassy, it also allows for longer breaks between treatments and therefore less damage caused by bleaching. I use this one by Pureology almost every time that I wash my hair, and I could not live without it.”

Wella EIMI Dry Me Dry Shampoo

“Second most important thing for me: dry shampoo. The trick to keeping my color at its prime is to not over-wash my hair. The more I wash it, the more my color fades — especially when I take a dip into the pink-hair pool. To keep from looking greasy, I use this Wella dry shampoo nearly every day, sometimes even when I’ve just washed my hair for a little added texture.”

Hot Tools Black Rose Gold Wand

“I’m a huge fan of bedhead, but sometimes it can get a little out of control — especially on the fourth day of not washing my hair. To keep things tame, I like to use a 1” curling wand to oomph things up a bit.”

Carolyn Negri, Client Services Manager

Revlon One-Step Hair Dryer and Styler

“While I don’t use heat on my hair very often, when I do, I want to be as efficient as possible. This hair dryer has become my HOLY GRAIL find. Before I use it, I detangle in the shower and make sure my hair is parted into sections. Once my hair is thoroughly moisturized, this stretches and dries my hair incredibly fast. What used to take me one or two hours now only takes 40 minutes. This usually sets my hair up for the best stretched twist-out.”

SheaMoisture Manuka Honey & Yogurt Hydrate + Repair Multi-Action Leave-In

“I love the SheaMoisture Manuka Honey line! After wetting my hair, this leave-in is the best next step to giving my hair lasting hydration. I spritz in each section, followed by a moisturizing cream, and seal with coconut oil.”

tgin Honey Curls Custard

“Honestly, my one issue with twist-outs is that I’ve found they never last throughout the week — and I’m all about low maintenance, so I hate having to re-do my hair mid-week. In comes tgin with the Curls Custard that gives me the soft hold I’m looking for, without the crunch and flakiness.”

Kayla Isaacs, Social Creative Coordinator

DevaCurl Arc Angel Gel Maximum Hold No-Crunch Styler

“I get my curls from my mama, so for pretty much ever, I’ve known how tough they are to tame. Between the weather (my hair makes me a human thermometer) and my dry spots, the finished look is always a gamble, which is why finding a styling product that actually works — and works consistently — feels pretty magical. This DevaCurl Arc Angel Gel hits my every curl need with its non-sticky cast that fights my frizz and defines each curl. And the best part? I know after every use I’ll be having a good hair day, all day.”

Tangle Teezer The Ultimate Detangler

“Raise your hand if you’re a long-shower girl like I am! Except for me, it’s not singing in the shower that doubles my rinse — it’s brushing through every knot on my head. And there’s usually a lot. Needless to say, an in-shower hairbrush is a must for my curls, and The Ultimate Detangler has been my savior. The no-slip grip helps me get through every hurdle my hair has in store, and the teeth help prevent pulling, tugging, and snagging, which luckily makes it not only pain-free but also so soothing and satisfying.”

Curlsmith Curl Quenching Conditioning Wash

“I’ll admit, it took me a while to realize that conditioner is the secret weapon to silky curls, but now that I know, I make sure to go for washes that will actually get the job done. This Curl Quenching Conditioning Wash sets me on track for smooth and soft curls, thanks to its ingredients that restore shine and retain moisture (I’m giddy just thinking about it). Plus, it’s a shampoo and conditioner in one, which makes things easy, and is cruelty-free, meaning it’s a triple win for me.”

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Refinery29 is partnering with Girls Who Code for the #MarchForSisterhood on International Day of the Girl. This is the first-ever all-digital global march. Come back each day this week to learn about why different young women are participating, and join us as we #MarchForSisterhood on any of your social media channels this Friday, October 11, 2019.

I am passionate about menstruation. I know menstruation is not the most common thing to be passionate about, but my passion for periods comes from a very personal place. I founded PERIOD when I was 16-years-old, inspired by my family’s own experience with housing instability and hearing stories from homeless women who, in much worse living situations than I was in, were using trash to take care of their periods when they couldn’t afford tampons and pads. I am driven to fight for this Menstrual Movement because I want all girls and women to be able to discover and reach their full potential without being held back by a natural need. What could be more natural than menstruation? Simply put, menstrual hygiene is a right, not a privilege.

When my co-founder and I started working on PERIOD, our mission was to serve 20 homeless women a week in downtown Portland, Oregon. We would raise money, buy period products,  create period care packages, and distribute them to local shelters. Naturally, as Gen Z teenagers , we posted on social media to share what we were doing. Our goal was small at first — we wanted to  mobilize people in our own community to start talking about periods and potentially join our volunteering events. Within a few months, we had hundreds of messages from students and journalists around the country asking how they could get involved and bring our work to their city. Our most common message went something like, “We’ve never thought about periods before as a need, but now that we think about it, of course it is a need!”

That’s the beautiful thing about menstruation in the first place – it’s this great equalizer amongst all people. No matter who you are, where you’re from, or what your status is in this world – if you were assigned female at birth, you will most likely menstruate monthly for an average of forty years. And oh yeah, by the way, menstruation makes human life possible! Yet, because of the stigma around menstruation, periods have remained a taboo topic. We don’t talk about our own periods, let alone ask what it’s like for other people to get theirs. So, even though it is a basic human bodily function, menstrual hygiene gets overlooked every day, especially the needs of marginalized women experiencing poverty.

PERIOD exists to put a stop this stigma and end period poverty. We have made toolkits on what we did in Portland available, encouraging people in other states to join the movement. So far we have created over 500 chapters in all 50 states and 30 countries. And, I recently published my first book Period Power: a Manifesto for the Menstrual Movement, and took a leave of absence from Harvard to scale PERIOD. What started as the passion project of two 16-year-olds has grown into an army of “Period Warriors” fighting for menstrual equity. Five years ago, we were google searching answers to questions like “What is a nonprofit?” and embarking on a journey where we constantly felt like we had no idea what we were doing – now we’re the largest youth-run NGO in women’s health in the world.

I am proud of what we have built, and thankful for the opportunity. While I am driven, of course, by my passion for this issue – I am also driven because activism saved my life. When I was 16, I felt voiceless. After experiencing sexual assault and rape at a young age, I was confused about the source of my self-worth. Activism, and realizing that I could mobilize people around something I truly believed in, made me realize how much power and potential there was in my own voice. This work saved my life, and has allowed and pushed me to reclaim my body and my voice for myself and others.

I march for periods. I march for menstruators, including trans and nonbinary friends who may also experience menstruation. I march for sisterhood because our movement is stronger when we uplift each other. I march for sisterhood because we are better, more inclusive and empathetic leaders when we have sisters standing by our sides – keeping us grounded and reminding us why we do what we do. I march for sisterhood because when it comes to this fight for gender equality, we have so much more work to do, and we are stronger when we work together.

Nadya Okamoto is the founder of PERIOD, the largest and fastest growing youth-run NGO in women’s health in the US, and Chief Brand Officer of JUV Consulting. Her first book, Period Power: a Manifesto for the Menstrual Movement, came out in October 2018.

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We live in a world where we tend to throw around the word ‘badass’ somewhat casually. But the true mark of badassery is having something officially named after you — be it a park bench, memorial theater, or a fancy gymnastics move. Simone Biles, 22, just moved into that terrific territory, as she performed at the world championships in Stuttgart, Germany this weekend.

USA Gymnastics announced on Twitter that her triple-double — a windy move involving a double backflip and three twists — would be officially dubbed the “Biles II.” This came after Biles successfully landed a triple-double during her floor routine and a double-double-dismount on the balance beam at the competition. 

The Federation of International Gymnastics needs to give approval before the Biles II move is officially named after her, Good Morning America reports.

Introducing the 𝐁𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐬 𝐈𝐈. #Stuttgart2019 | @Simone_Biles pic.twitter.com/AYIDZwCmAJ

— Team USA (@TeamUSA) October 5, 2019

Biles has a history of breaking records. CNN reports that the famed gymnast already has multiple moves named after her. One is a floor move and the other is on a vault. GMA notes she has another eponymous move on the balance beam. She became the first ever female gymnast to land a clean triple-double at the USA Gymnastics Championship back in August. Don’t forget at the 2016 Olympics, she was part of the “final five” team that brought home gold. 

Although it sounds like Biles is nothing short of a “superstar” gymnast, she doesn’t like to use that term, she revealed last week during a press conference right before the big competition, officially called the 2019 FIG Artistic Gymnastics World Championships. 

“If I were to label myself as a superstar, it would bring more expectations on me and I would feel pressured — more in the limelight,” she said, according to People Magazine. “I try to represent Simone… not ‘Simone Biles’ whenever I go out there, because at the end of the day, I’m still a human being before I’m ‘Simone Biles, the superstar.’”

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Beauty is gendered — more specifically, who gets to be seen as beautiful is defined by how we perceive their gender. At one end of the gender spectrum, you have men, who get to be “handsome.” At the other, you have women, who get to be “beautiful.” But what happens if you don’t follow society’s traditional binary ideals?

We inherit this idea from a beauty industry that thrives on a stringent gender divide. Take the fact that products for “men” and “women” come in completely different packaging and different scents, with different prices and different claims, while essentially being the same item. It has led to the idea that for women to be “beautiful” they must embody a strict set of rules derived from the traditional aesthetics of “womanhood” — rules that embrace makeup, certain silhouettes, and specific hairstyles.

For years, people have been fighting to challenge these expectations, attempting to broaden the narrow perimeters of mainstream beauty to include different races, genders, body types, and sexualities. It is an ongoing battle, but those perimeters have yet to widen enough to include those who renounce beauty standards entirely. 

To be butch, we are led to believe, is to be the antithesis to “traditional” beauty. By appearing deliberately gender-nonconforming, butch women and people are seen to be rejecting traditional forms of femininity. But rejection of femininity is not a rejection of beauty. Nor is it a bid to “look like” or embody masculinity. The beauty of butchness is that it creates its own category, one that stands apart from patriarchal standards and celebrates new versions of womanhood and non-binary identity. 

To learn more, we spoke to three butches about the beauty of being themselves in a world that “others” them. As these conversations show, solace comes with the freedom to feel comfortable presenting in the manner that women and assigned-female-at-birth non-binary people are taught not to. It’s a beauty that embodies same-sex and queer desire, is inescapably dyke camp, and is largely missing from mainstream media. “Society isn’t telling us that we’re beautiful,” said participant Xandice, “[so] we have to start telling each other.”

“‘Butch’ was a dirty word for me for years, I’d feel sick if I said it out loud. Whereas now I relish it. It’s synonymous with all of my favorite things: leather, denim, work boots, swagger, having an uncontrollable urge to wink. It’s a very specific and nuanced energy.

I came out later than most, at 25. About six months after I came out to my mum, I felt free to pick up where I left off at 14 with my gender presentation. I have a very inherent butchness that I really repressed, so it felt like stepping into my own body as I’d always been. My first short haircut felt like my inner magnetic field flipping over 180 degrees. That was the moment in my coming out when I became myself.

My family have largely come to terms with my sexuality, or at least understand what they can and can’t say about it. On the other hand, they feel it’s far more socially acceptable to critique my gender presentation than my sexuality itself. There’s far less pressure for people to pretend to be fine with you being butch. My uncle recently said to me, ‘Why do you want to look like a man?’ I don’t look like a man! I look like a butch woman, it’s not a choice — I’m butch because I can’t be anything other than that.

When I was more neutrally presenting I didn’t experience that much harassment, but now it’s basically daily. It’s so acceptable to see butch women as ‘other’ and see them as wrong, gross, even dirty. I’m doing everything you’re taught not to do as a woman, and the harassment seems like a more culturally acceptable homophobia. I appear very clearly as someone who is rejecting being sexualized by men and their gaze.

Butchness has a history tied to working-class women that’s very important to me. There’s a bit in Stone Butch Blues by Leslie Feinberg about the revolution around gay identities that happened in the ’70s and ’80s, which saw far more middle-class lesbians taking over the community and rejecting the butches and femmes. It’s part of the reason why I’ve leaned into the butch identity. Being from a working class background also compounds the homophobia and butchphobia you’re confronted with, and it felt like there was much more stigma and shame. I didn’t know anyone who was a lesbian, I didn’t think it was a thing you could be until I was at university. But that’s why there’s something so important about being butch and participating in that cultural history.

I have several older butch women in my life who are some of the most important people I think I’ve ever met. Coming out was a really difficult time for me and I was incredibly grateful to have those women in my life. While it certainly feels like there aren’t many of us, out on the street you’re quite visible to each other. A nod of recognition or a moment of eye contact can sustain me through a whole day of being called ‘sir,’ because I was seen for a second by somebody who understands what I am.

Even before I came out, ‘beauty’ was a term I hugely struggled with, but now I can see that of course I’m beautiful! I think women are beautiful, butch women are women, and therefore I am the most beautiful I’ve ever felt right now. I see my butchness as one kind of femininity on a three-dimensional spectrum of femininity. I don’t like being referred to as ‘masc-of-center’ or having female masculinity — after years of trying to understand myself, I’m extremely comfortable identifying as a woman through understanding myself as a butch woman. I can’t deal with it being this kind of line where I’m closer to the men than I am extremely femme women. I feel like I have far more in common with high femmes than I do any cis man.”

“Even though I never identified as lesbian (I came out as queer when I was 17), I’ve always felt aligned with butchness. When I see someone else who claims the word ‘butch,’ or presents in a way that you’d call a ‘traditional’ butch, I can relate to them immediately. Whether you’re a butch lesbian or masc-presenting woman, assigned-female-at-birth person or non-binary butch person, you’re hyper-visible. Even when you try to assimilate, people seem to see through that and pick you out. When I was at school, I’d wear the ‘girls’ uniform, but people would still ask, ‘Are you a boy or a girl?’ There’s something about the way you carry yourself, the way you act, that communicates that you’re not fitting into these traditional gender roles.

People feel like they can abuse masculine-presenting people for doing gender ‘wrong.’ It’s the homophobic, queerphobic, transphobic phenomenon of not respecting people that you’re not attracted to. Butches are not trying to fit into heteronormative societal ideals. We’re not trying to be desirable for men, we’re not trying to be anything; we’re just living authentically and doing what makes us feel good. A dangerous way to live, but it’s the only way I know how.

My gender and identity is a kind of soup: I identify as trans-masculine, masculine-of-center, masc, butch, and non-binary, which are all tied up together. I’ve always identified as genderqueer which manifests, for me, in being butch. It’s me pushing away who I was expected to be.

When I was a baby butch, ‘beauty’ was something that I never believed was for me, but my femme partner has really helped me to see the beauty in being butch. Instagram and Tumblr also helped me see people like me and see the inherent beauty we share. If I didn’t have that, I could easily be beaten down. I’m a black, butch, non-binary, trans-masculine person — that’s a specific niche you really have to seek out to be affirmed. Society isn’t telling us that we’re beautiful — we have to start telling each other.

We’ve come leaps and bounds in representation since I secretly watched Sugar Rush as a teenager, but people like me still aren’t included — largely because the creators and people with money are cis and straight. They’re still going to be catering toward a largely cis and straight audience that is open to mainly seeing the non-threatening forms of queerness we’ve been socialized to accept, like feminine lesbians and white, cis gay men. Seeing the people that you would abuse on the street as beautiful in the media would completely be destabilizing.

It affects you, because you see queer people on screen but they’re not like you, so you must not be desirable. We need to try to get more representation; we can’t just be having Shane from The L Word. It’s why seeing Lena Waithe being a butch-presenting, masculine-presenting beautiful black woman is huge! Watching Orange is the New Black and seeing different kinds of queer people expressing gender is huge. I want to see more of that. Let those young butches know that we’re out here and that you can live and be butch and be happy.”

“I’ve never been able to hide the fact that I am queer — people would look at me and know straight away. I’ve tried to hide my butchness in the past but I just can’t. Whenever I tried to be more feminine it felt… wrong. So I’ve always associated being butch with being comfortable and confident in myself. I’ve had to learn that confidence from a very early age, even if I didn’t always feel it.

It’s only very recently I started using the word about myself. Before then, I’d always felt a bit nervous to identify in that way, even though I have many friends that do and they wear it with pride. I feel a lot of solidarity when I use the word ‘butch’ now.

I literally never saw anyone anywhere that looked like me when I was younger. Now you occasionally see representation, like on Orange Is The New Black you have Big Boo, but it wasn’t always positive connotations. Her character was painted as sleazy, like it’s part of her butchness. It was only when I started working in Dr. Martens in 2014 that I seriously did change the way I present and felt way more comfortable. I go out of my way now to follow people on social media who look like me. It’s quite important to always remind myself that there are people out there that look like me who are surviving and thriving. (Though, to be honest, I still mainly follow animals.)

There are always so many expectations of how I’ll behave, and I’m not always as ‘butch’ as people think I am. I am sometimes quite feminine in my mannerisms — people act really confused when I giggle in a very high-pitched tone, which I don’t really understand. Because at the end of the day, I still identify as a cis woman. I wish straight people could be a bit more flexible in how they see and categorize things, because I don’t get this from other LGBTQ+ people. They can’t compute me.

Growing up, I wouldn’t say I really ever considered myself beautiful. I struggled a lot with that. I’ve always known I’m not straight, but I also liked guys in school, though I never got attention from them. Even when I started presenting in a more masculine way and my partner would call me beautiful, I’d feel really uncomfortable with it and I’d ask her to use something like ‘handsome’ instead. I think it’s a gendered thing. You wouldn’t typically call someone masculine of any gender ‘beautiful,’ you’d say handsome or something like that.

I also think [that] growing up, I have distanced myself from feeling beautiful. Sometimes I don’t know if that’s because I feel uncomfortable with the way I have presented in the past, or just because I have grown up quite insecure and I’ve never really been viewed in that way. It could also be a mix of both of those things. In school, I got no attention whatsoever, but when I started going out in queer spaces I was getting a lot of attention from people. At first I was really confused, I just wasn’t used to it — I thought people were taking the piss out of me or something. When I did start presenting in a more masculine way and started accepting who I am, I suddenly became a lot more confident and felt actually comfortable with myself and thought, Yeah! I actually look quite good, I do feel beautiful, I do feel good.“

This story was originally published on Refinery29 UK.

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Update: Cara Santana’s size-inclusive, under-$100 Apt. 9 line for Kohl’s is now available to shop on Kohls.com.

This story was originally published on September 16, 2019.

It’s no secret that some retail behemoths love designer and celebrity collaborations. But while those limited edition launches are a success at just about any shopping destination, no brand has the practice down quite like Kohl’s.

At the moment, America’s largest department store chain has a roster unlike any of its competitors. Lauren Conrad’s line, LC Lauren Conrad is celebrating its 10th anniversary this year. Vera Wang’s label, Simply Vera Vera Wang, continues to bring in praise (and cash) after 12 years. And Popsugar’s millennial-focused collection for Kohl’s has been thriving since it launched in 2018.

Between you and me, though, the brand’s latest partnership is shaping up to be their best one yet.

Today, Kohl’s announces the first of many collaborations coming out of their design office over the next year: a 37-piece size-inclusive collection designed by Cara Santana. The Santa Clarita Diet actress, fashion influencer, and founder of the beauty app, The Glam App, has been shopping at Kohl’s ever since she was a little girl growing up in El Paso, Texas, and that’s precisely why she sought out the All-American brand for her first-ever dip in the design pool.

The limited-edition capsule, which will fall under their Apt. 9 line, incorporates all of today’s most popular trends, from oversized plaid suits to neon blazers — all available in sizes 00 to 22 and retailing for under $100. To get the lowdown on all things Cara Santana x Kohl’s, we sat down with the designer herself while she put the finishing touches on the collection at the Kohl’s Midtown office. Ahead, read all about her quintessential fall look, her affinity for shopping at department stores, and her decision to hand-select every model for the ad campaign.

Refinery29: When you were presented with this opportunity, what was your initial reaction and what were you looking forward to most?

Cara Santana: “So the honest to goodness truth is that I really didn’t have any desire to design a clothing line or be a fashion designer. It wasn’t on my radar, but I love fashion. I love how transformative it is. I love how you’re able to create your essence and your aesthetic and that it can evolve, even day-to-day. And that you can express yourself. “

“When the idea of designing a collection came to mind, to me, the only place I wanted it to be was Kohl’s. I fought really, really hard and basically begged Kohl’s to let me do it with their amazing team. I thought about me as a little girl, and what self-expression really meant to me, and given that I grew up in, you know, a small, rural town in Texas, we were really limited in what we had access to. I went to a private school and we were relegated to uniforms, so I felt sort of…”

Stifled.

CS: “Stifled. That’s a great word. I felt so stifled by it. And my mom, every Sunday, would take me to Kohl’s. It was the only outlet I had and we would spend hours there. That’s sort of when I first learned about fashion and how to be a smart shopper. If there was something I wanted, my mom would always be like, ‘Okay, we’ll hold it here. Walk around the store, and if you still can’t live without it then we’ll get it.'”

That’s still a shopping a rule that I still live by.

CS: “Do you?”

If you go home and you’re still thinking about it, then you need to go back and get it.

“Exactly. It was a time when I bonded with my mom. And for me, the idea of supporting, empowering, and uplifting women — young women, in particular, but all women — is so much a part of my brand. I think about it when I take projects in entertainment, I think about it when I do endorsements, and so, for me, I’m just like, ‘If this is gonna make sense for me to do, it has to be with Kohl’s. Like, is that an option?'”

If it’s not, make it one.

CS: “Make it one — and I did. It’ll be a year when the collection comes out, from when we started, which is crazy.”

How many times did you go back and forth on colors, silhouettes, styles, etc. throughout the process?

CS: “When I took my first meeting with the design team, we ended up designing pretty much the entire collection within four hours. I felt so inspired. When I started thinking about women, what women need, what isn’t out there and the exclusivity that the fashion industry is often synonymous with, I just got really excited to be able to offer something new for them. So yeah, we did it in one fell swoop. And then I kept coming back to play with colors and fabrics and, to be honest, you know, we had to work really hard to get this done.”

“Also, we did it all before Kohl’s had agreed to sign on. So to finish in time to show them, I ended up shooting the collection. My team and I, we went out in -20 degree weather, and shot the collection. Thankfully, they liked it.”

Besides your personal connection with the brand, are there other reasons why you chose to work with Kohl’s?

CS: “They have such a great reach, so this collection that I feel is so inclusive and affordable, yet fashionable and diverse, is gonna reach so many young girls.”

Speaking of your own style, how would you describe your own personal style?

“I would say that I’m classic, but with a modern twist. I tend to be a little bit edgier. Very eclectic. So some days, I’m like, ‘I wanna wear an oversized men’s suit with tennis shoes and walk through New York City and feel powerful.’ And then, you know, tonight, I’ll be like, ‘I wanna wear a sequin outfit with heels and be super glam.’ I define my style based on how I’m feeling every day, which I feel is true for most women.”

Can you describe your quintessential fall fashion look?

CS: “Well I would probably start with a good pant, a.k.a. the leather pants from Apt. 9 that I feel any woman can wear. Then I’d add a nice knit sweater, so probably my white sweater with the cool detailing up the sleeve. And then I would throw on a great piece of outerwear: my neon coat.”

What about shoes?

CS: “That depends on where I am and where I’m going. But I would either wear a good sneaker or a nice pump.”

Do you have a favorite piece from the collection?

“I mean, I really do love the entire collection. I think the pieces that I was like, ‘I can’t live without’ are the sequin set, the navy pajama set, the trench, and the plaid suit. That’s like asking me to pick between my favorite dogs though. I love them all.”

When you spend nine months with something, you’re likely to get attached.

CS: “It’s like having a baby, yes. I birthed a collection for Kohl’s.”

What about the collection really makes it special?

“The thing that makes this collection the most special is the campaign. I really wanted to create, again, a feeling of inclusivity and diversity. The campaign is so special to me because that’s when I first saw the collection come to life — I saw my vision realized. We created a campaign that is age-inclusive. The oldest model is my mom, and she’s, well, let’s just say she’s over 60. We also have a gender non-binary model, a Muslim woman who, up until a year ago, was fully covered, making this her first opportunity to be in a campaign where she was showing herself in clothing, a feat that was very emotional for her and for all of us. We have women of color. We have size inclusivity, with models going up to size 22.”

“I wanted to show this collection on every shape, every size, every height — every woman. For me, that’s what this collection is all about. Society, in general, is shifting. We’re coming out of that mindset of style over substance. We are yearning for substance with style and I feel like this collection and this campaign really showcases that.”

“This was not about doing a fashion line because I wanted to design clothes. This was about creating wearable, functional and fashionable options for young women all over the country so that they could look and feel their best.”

A handful of brands are making these changes, but in the grand scheme of things, the fashion industry still isn’t very inclusive.

CS: “It’s not. Or a brand has its token something. Which, I mean, I guess any step in that direction is a positive step, but it’s just not enough. Female shoppers need to see themselves. One of the most important topics that I discussed with Kohl’s for the collection was shattering the comparison culture. The reason that we have a culture of comparison is that we can’t identify with what we see, so we look at what we do see and reflect back to ourselves. If we looked at ads in magazines and saw a genuine reflection of what women look like then we wouldn’t be comparing ourselves, we’d be identifying. That’s what I wanted this collection to do.”

How did you go about casting models?

“All of the women in my campaign are either women that I am close to or women that I admire. So, Najwa is a poet and author. She grew up in Lebanon. She has an incredible story. She talks a lot about overcoming obstacles. She is Muslim and was covered until a year ago, so she felt a lot of backlash when she started taking off her clothing and dressing for herself. I was so inspired by her and what she’s done and the positivity that she really emanates.

“And then Stephanie Shepherd is one of my closest friends. She’s curvy, she’s mixed race, she’s Japanese and Caucasian, and she’s had such an incredible trajectory from being, you know, a dancer for the Cavaliers to the CEO of all Kardashian-West brands. She’s since left and is now doing her own thing and I was like, ‘That is empowerment.’ You know? So I knew that I wanted to have her in the campaign.”

“My mother was always there at the dinner table and stayed up all night with us to do our homework, but still got up and went to the office to be a powerhouse attorney. On top of that, she’s feminine, kind, loving, strong and powerful. So I was like, ‘I have to have my mom in the campaign.’ Every woman spoke to me in a different way, but what they all share in common is that they’re women of empowerment.”

Moms, they’re the best. So before we sign off, is there anything else that you want our readers to know about the collection?

CS: “Well, I think it’s important for customers to know that the collection is all under $100, it’s affordable. We as women shouldn’t have to give up looking good to save money. That’s not fun. Why can’t I have clothing that looks and feels good that also won’t hinder me from being able to pay my rent or my mortgage or care for my children? That, and the fact that the collection will be available both online and in (most) stores, so if you go to your local store and something’s sold out, fingers crossed, you can buy it online.”

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Refinery29 is partnering with Girls Who Code for the #MarchForSisterhood on International Day of the Girl. This is the first-ever all-digital global march. Come back each day this week to learn about why different young women are participating, and join us as we #MarchForSisterhood on any of your social media channels this Friday, October 11, 2019.

Three years into the computer science major, I’ve long gotten used to seeing that an overwhelming amount of my professors, teaching assistants, and classmates are male. It has, unfortunately, become normal for me to be pleasantly surprised when I find out that a professor or teaching assistant is female. You’ve probably heard this story before, perhaps so much that it’s become repetitive. But I’ll repeat it again: It is 2019, 70 years since the invention of programming, and a huge gender gap in the tech industry still exists.

Every business is now a software business. The daily use of computer-programmed tools in business workflows heavily contributes to the shaping of our communities, industries, and our world. The lack of women in tech consequently means the lack of opportunity for women to impact our rapidly growing world. As each day passes where software is developed without contributions of diverse perspectives, the gaps widen between us and the multiple efforts we’re marching for.

Research shows that this gender imbalance in tech stems from the different ways in which children are raised. Young boys are given computers, gaming consoles, and tech-related toys, while girls are given household-themed toys. At an early age, girls are already taught the idea that they do not belong in tech, when really, their contributions are significant. This is why I believe so strongly in the #MarchForSisterhood movement and the efforts of Girls Who Code — showing girls what they’re capable of, the existence of the communities in which they belong, and how they can learn to code to work on projects they believe in. These efforts go way beyond the computer screen — they change the world. 

I’ve always had a great interest in tech. I grew up with a desktop computer, playing early 2000’s games and making digital paintings, and I participated in the Girls Who Code and 3D printing clubs later in high school. Interestingly, I hadn’t thought about a role in tech until I watched a TED Talk, where Danielle Feinberg from Pixar presented the immersion of tech and art behind animation. This inspiration, along with the skills I learned in the clubs, led me to switch out of the pre-medicine path and apply directly for Computer Science tracks at universities, before I had even taken any CS courses.   

Sisterhood and the sense of community are two of the key ways I juggled chasing my dreams and imposter syndrome. For the past three years, I’ve dreamed of working as a technical director for the animation industry to foster the collaborative work of artists and engineers. I remember as a freshman girl in my CS courses feeling small and incompetent of ever achieving such a dream. However, once I spoke to more women in tech and Girls Who Code alumni at hackathons and conferences, I faced my fears, felt motivated to seize opportunity, and became more confident. Sophomore year I went on to network with amazing industry professionals, became secretary of my university’s CS club, and co-found my university’s first on-campus hackathon. This year, I began attending larger, intimidating conferences and taking more rigorous computing courses — all with excitement rather than fear. Moreover, the confidence I gained from this community and as a computer scientist started influencing my personal life, making me more confident and self-loving in areas that I had low self esteem for a long time. Becoming a software engineer and being part of the women in tech community changed my life and my mindset.

How can we foster sisterhood? We march for it! As a Girls Who Code alum, working with the team to support other alumni is one way I contribute to the community I’ve gained so much from. Seeing the act of raising each other up, reminding each other of our worth, and sharing advice and my experiences with younger women aspiring to go into tech are large contributors to creating impactful sisterhood communities. To always listen to other’s perspectives and pass on our own, we create an ongoing, sturdy chain of support. Here’s to marching for sisterhood, fostering growth, and supporting women in the tech industry.

Kamile Demir is a senior Computer Science major and Digital Arts minor at Stony Brook University, as well as the Girls Who Code Alumni Team intern. Hobbies include traveling, painting, and bedazzling her Instagram pictures. 

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Refinery29 is proud to team up with the LYCRA® Brand to celebrate denim made with LYCRA® dualFX® technology, designed to provide women forging their own paths as mother, mentors, and entrepreneurs with the comfort and support they need from their jeans.

The mentor-mentee relationship is a complicated one. It’s nuanced — perpetually in flux. For plenty of us, it comes inside of a strictly academic or professional template. But for Latham Thomas and MaryAnn Elizabeth, the notion of mentorship is much broader and more colorful than that.

Latham, founder of Mama Glow — an agency supporting women in a number of holistic ways through pregnancy, birthing, and maternity — works as both an acting doula and the figurehead for a full network of other doulas and birth partners. MaryAnn is among the first models over the age of 50 to start booking major label campaigns, carving a space in the industry for women with gray hair and creased skin to see themselves reflected in ads for face creams and clothing lines.

Both women are mothers, entrepreneurs, and models of independent success — and while their days often call for outfit changes, photo shoots, business meetings, and children’s sports games, the one thing they don’t have to worry about is what to wear. No matter the occasion, they each swear by their NYDJ jeans, made with LYCRA® dualFX® technology to help their denim retain its shape, while offering all the stretch they need to tackle their hectic, eclectic schedules.

We sat down with both Latham and MaryAnn for an open, candid discussion about motherhood, vulnerability, great denim, and how we ought to be framing mentorship in 2019.

How would you define mentorship as it exists in your own life?

Latham Thomas: “When I think about mentorship, I first think about the work of a doula. Essentially, we hold people’s hands as they navigate the uncharted waters of giving birth. Whether or not birth is involved, mentorship is all about that hand-holding. It doesn’t matter if you both bring entirely different things to the table or if your personal and professional goals align. Either way, it’s someone crossing those waters with you, holding your hand. There’s no hierarchy to it — it’s definitely not an I’m the boss of you sort of relationship. Instead, it’s a what can we both bring to the table sort of situation.”

MaryAnn Elizabeth: “When I was in my early 40s, I went back to school to get an MFA in visual art. In my program, we would fill out these forms to request that other artists be our mentors. The funny thing was, I never really learned anything from these people. Their whole job was to mentor me, but so much more of my inspiration and support and guidance was coming from my friends, my children, and my husband. I think mentorship is just all about keeping your eyes open to the people who might really impact you.”

How do you dress yourself for your hectic, busy days?

LM: “My first go-to outfit is a jumpsuit, with a scarf and booties or sneakers. This is both chic and practical for days filled with movement. My second go-to is anything that incorporates my NYDJ jeans. When you’re constantly on the go like I am, you need to be able to move in your denim, and LYCRA® dualFX® technology makes that possible, even in jeans. I want to wear jeans that I can meditate in, step into a birth and do my doula work in, and also pair with a blazer for a meeting. Versatility is key for the modern woman.”

ME: “What I wear definitely influences my mood, and I know that feeling confident is key! My days are jam-packed and involve a lot of hustle, so comfort is essential, but all the same, style is still critical. NYDJ’s ultra-stretch, shape-retaining denim with LYCRA® dualFX® technology is the perfect base to any outfit. I can add a structured blazer and pumps for a classic look or go for a bold denim-on-denim pairing. I even prefer cropped, NYDJ denim in place of tights or leggings for layering under a springy dress or a boxy knit sweater. Honestly, it’s amazing what I can conquer in a great pair of jeans!”

Who has served as your greatest professional mentor?

LT: “Unfortunately, when I first got started as a doula, I didn’t necessarily have a role model or mentor in the industry. But one thing that I think is so important for everyone to think about when they’re considering mentorship is the idea that someone in a completely different field with a completely different approach to life might be your greatest source of inspiration.

“One of my biggest mentors and supporters is actually a florist. She’s a good friend and somebody who was incredibly helpful in introducing me to clients, talking through some of my ideas, and just being an excellent listener and source of support when I was starting my business.”

ME: “To be honest, I don’t think I had a professional mentor. In art school, most of my fellow students and professors were men, and I felt like there were a lot of really traditional stereotypes in place that I had to push back against. When I got into the modeling industry, I was an older woman, and I was a mom. I’m 51 now, and at the time I was 47. I wasn’t meeting anyone who was doing the same thing as I was.”

What has your experience been like, acting as a professional mentor?

LT: “With Mama Glow, all my doulas do these monthly mentor calls. They all call in from across the country and they ask me questions, and I give them my best possible answers, but the important part is that everyone’s on the line — that we’re all learning from each other’s questions and vulnerabilities. The idea is that we’re all mentors and mentees at the same time.”

ME: “The most gratifying part of being in this field is definitely being able to make women my age — or honestly [women] over the age of 30 — feel seen. I get a lot of messages on Instagram or even comments in person like, ‘I just really love that you’re representing how women are aging — that it’s okay to age, and we have permission.’ I mean, it’s just a natural part of life, and men have been allowed to do it for a long time, and it’s such an honor to be a figurehead for graceful, prideful aging. I think this is the most important form of mentorship I’ve been a part of to date.”

How has motherhood changed your relationship to mentorship?

ME: “As a parent, I often think mentorship is kind of subconscious. It doesn’t have to be this thing you do with intention. When I went back to school, it was something I did for me, not necessarily for my children. But when my oldest son wrote his college essay, I read it and got totally choked up. He talked about how that time in my life — the choice to go back to school — really impacted his choices. He wrote about how much that taught him about self-motivation and education. Of course, as mothers, we all want to have the opportunity to be good role models, but the reality is that we have no idea what will truly land with our kids — what will stick with them.”

LT: “In all honesty, my son is my greatest mentor. Children are so fearless and perceptive — they have so much to teach us. Yes, I’m his parent, but I’ve always felt like we’re here to guide each other. He has a lot to learn from me, sure, but I’m learning from him all the time. He’s really into music — and he’s been incredibly successful as a DJ. He’s done some major events and played at some major venues, and he’s only 16. I’m so inspired by that passion and that drive and that self-awareness. He taught me that you can be any age and go after what you want. You don’t have to wait until you get older. You have agency today.”

What advice would you give other women about building and maintaining powerful mentor-mentee networks in their lives?

LT: “When people approach this idea of mentorship, they treat it like this formal thing. Like, you have to go over to someone and say, ‘Hi, will you be my mentor?’ I think that people who are seeking mentorship need to understand that you already have gifts and knowledge yourself. Allowing someone to mentor you doesn’t mean they’re better than you — it just means that you have different things to teach one another.”

ME: “When I was teaching art in a classroom, after I got my MFA, I would always tell my students to take some risks — to be a little vulnerable. I would see kids who were so afraid to make mistakes — terrified even — and it would restrict them from their creativity. They would be so cautious. I would just say: Fall flat on your face. Make mistakes. Make a ton of them. Make as many as possible as fast as you can because as soon as you do, you’ll stop being so terrified of vulnerability — and all the best mentoring and guidance comes from allowing yourself to be vulnerable and open to what other people have to offer.”

As both women make clear in their remarkable journeys towards entrepreneurship, motherhood, and personal success, these things don’t happen alone. Fortunately, both MaryAnn and Latham have remarkable mentors and mentees in their lives. They find support in friends, family, and of course, reliable, shape-retaining denim like NYDJ jeans with LYCRA® dualFX® technology.

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